Q: Should I tell people I’m nervous, or will that make me look weak?

A: Being nervous doesn’t make you weak, it makes you human. In fact, vulnerability often connects people. When you admit ‘I’m feeling really nervous,’ you often discover others feel the same way but were also hiding it. Suddenly you’re not alone; you’re part of a community of people experiencing the same thing.

That said, there’s a difference between acknowledging nerves and dwelling on them. Saying ‘I’m a bit nervous but I’ve prepared well’ is honest without being self-defeating. Repeatedly announcing ‘I’m going to mess up, I’m so anxious, I can’t do this’ reinforces negative expectations.

It’s also worth considering your audience. Telling your supportive trainer or a fellow competitor might bring comfort. Telling your highly critical barn mate, who thrives on others’ discomfort, might not. Choose people who respond to vulnerability with kindness.

Sometimes naming your anxiety reduces its power. Speaking it aloud can make it feel less overwhelming. Other times, keeping it private and dealing with it internally works better. Do what feels right for you; there’s no single correct approach.

Remember that experienced competitors understand nerves completely. Any rider who claims they never feel nervous is either lying or has a very unusual nervous system. Nervousness is the norm, not the exception.